Some people are just dull

Been thinking tonight.  I had a small squabble with a wonderful friend, but we sorted it out, and all is good.  And see, that's the thing.  When you have a disagreement, you figure it out.  It doesn't matter who did what, or what it even happened.  The answer is communication.

Now, I'm not always the best at communication.  When I get upset, I clam up.  When things aren't going well, I clam up.  I guess I don't like to share the icky.  I feel that people don't want to hear it.  But the thing is, real friends, and family, want to hear from you, good stuff or icky stuff.  And this is something that is hard for me.  But, I'm learning.

I am blessed with an amazing family, and I am blessed with great friends.  You know who you are.  And I love you all.  Unfortunately, I thought some people were good friends, but they weren't.  And I think it's those burns that have made me keep the icky close to my chest.  And you know?  You know who you are in this instance (person from Downers Grove who stalks my blog), among others.

Thank you to my wonderful family and friends.  And, to the friends that I haven't seen, face to face, in a little while or in a long while, but who I know I could pick up with like no time has passed, well, you're aces in my book.

Thank you.

5 Things

Years ago, I had a Gratitude Journal, one of those Sarah Ban Breathnach journals.  Every day I would write down 5 things I was grateful for on that specific day.  It was a good exercise, it made me think in a more positive light, because I was looking for those "half-full" instances.

I was given a lovely journal for my birthday, and I haven't used it yet.  It sits, a blank slate, just waiting for me to fill it.  And I think I know what I'm going to do with it now!

Starting today, 5 things I am grateful for.  Maybe I will share some here.  Stay tuned for gratitude!

Life is Never Dull!

I have one week until I'm taking a week off - using some vacation time.  I went to bed last night making a mental list of everything I wanted to get done this week at work before I'm off for a week.

And then I get up.  And I have this sinking feeling.  Not sure why.  Until I try to wake up the kid.

AND SHE IS SICK.  Yuck yuck sick.  Can't even sit up - face hurts, throat hurts, can't move.

OH NO.  I call the clinic and make an appointment for her to get in to her nurse practitioner.  11am.  I'm guessing it's a sinus infection, except her throat hurts, she can't even swallow.

We get there, the nurse takes her vitals, including her temperature, and the kid actually has a temperature.  Here's the verbal exchange we had:

"You have a fever!"  "You never have a fever when we go to the doctor!"

"Mom, when was the last time I had a fever?"

"The last time you had Strep."

BINGO.  You guessed it - the kid has Strep.  And she is miserable.  We got home, and I called in to the library.  I don't care if the kid is 14 (and a half).  When your kid has Strep and a fever - you stay home.  My director wasn't very happy, but what can you do?  Certainly not leave your kid home alone!  Poor girl - she was miserable.  Slept some, moaned and groaned and was generally very unhappy.  Finally took some ibuprofen, which helped.  Eventually, I made her get out of bed and plant herself on the couch in the loft and we watched tv and relaxed.  The ibuprofen and the antibiotics are kicking in some.

It's awful when your kid is sick, but you take care of them and make sure they know they are loved and cherished.  And be grateful for antibiotics that are meant to be taken for things like Strep.

Happy Birthday to Dr. Seuss.  And in his honor, one of my favorite quotes:

‎"Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind." ~Dr. Seuss

More to Stephen Bloom, because he pisses me off.

I just saw you on NBC, interviewed by Willie Geist.  Wow, Stephen Bloom.  You are really anti-Christian, aren't you?  For a Jewish man, who has had, I'm sure, encounters with anti-semitism, you sure are quick to be prejudiced.

You are living in Iowa.  Do you realize that the Midwest was settled by immigrants from northern Europe?  People from Germany, Scandinavia, the British Isles?  Last time I checked, most of those people are Protestants.  Lots of Lutherans and Methodists, and Presbyterians, and Episcopalians.  Some Catholics.  Not too may Jews.

So get over it.  You knew, moving to Iowa, that there is not a large Jewish population.  If you didn't, you are pretty naive.  Oh, and by the way, there have been bagels in Iowa City long before you moved here in the early 90s.  I've been living here since 1984, and found bagels pretty darn accessible before you got here.

Get over yourself.

It's All About You, Isn't it, Prof. Bloom....

I am AMAZED, absolutely amazed at the attention over Prof. Bloom's Atlantic article.  Amazed in a good way, I should add.  It thrills me how proud we Iowans are, and how quick we move to express our displeasure  and defend our home.

Unfortunately, it appears that all Prof. Bloom can do is moan and groan and make it all about him.  In an article in the Des Moines Register, Bloom was quoted as saying “As happened with ‘Postville,’ over the last several days, I’ve received scores of emails and phone calls, calling me all sorts of hateful things. Some of the responses, frankly, are frightening.

“Diversity of opinion is a cornerstone of democratic thought and principle. It’s what we hold above almost everything else.

“The easiest response to my article is to condemn me and the issues I raise. That’s a tried-and-true tactic. Kill the messenger, ignore the message. That’s safe and convenient. But it doesn’t get at some of the raw, undeniable questions this story poses.”

Really, Prof. Bloom?  Do you even understand what it is that people are so upset about?  We aren't necessarily upset that you brought attention to some of the problems and challenges that face the state of Iowa.  But these aren't problems that only Iowa faces.  They are problems you will find everywhere in the U.S.  

What upset us are the stereotypes and cliches that you used to paint Iowans as a bunch of ignorant hicks.  That you painted Iowa as a homogeneous, whitebread state.  That you painted Iowans as people scared to death to leave the state and look for something better. Yet, you threw all your disdain on the state when you talked about how young people leave the state in droves.  You are talking out of both sides of your mouth, that's for sure.

I still am unsure why it's a bad thing to use the backdoor.  I have NEVER heard the caucus called a 'chat and chew.'  Seriously?  Where do you get that?  No one calls I-80 'the highway.'  Where I live, in the Iowa City area, we just call it "80."  I've never eaten a casserole at a wedding.  No jello, either.  

As for Iowa being a homogeneous, whitebread state, you are so out of touch.  I am a librarian in North Liberty, a small town in the greater Iowa City area.  North Liberty is incredibly diverse for its size.  On a daily basis I can hear Russian, Slavic, and Spanish spoken as I work the circulation desk.  We have a great many African American patrons, people who have moved here from the Chicago area to get away from the crime and high unemployment that plague Illinois.  Oh, yea, you mocked Iowa for our low crime rate, didn't you?

This is really just scratching the surface of your laughable article.  There are many who are much more eloquent than I, but I definitely have the right to disagree with you and post my thoughts.  As much of a right as you.

In the end, as angry as I am, I really feel sorry for you.  You don't know how good you've got it, living in an extraordinary state and an extraordinary community.  Iowans are the friendliest people I know, quick to help  neighbors and even strangers when needed.  I have a feeling, Prof. Bloom, that no matter where you live, you would be disdainful of those around you.  Because it's all about you, isn't it?

Dear Professor Bloom

For YEARS I have been irritated, and oftentimes infuriated, by the coastal mindset that the Midwest is "flyover" country.  Today I read an article, written by a professor at the University of Iowa, that really set me off.  


Stephen Bloom moved to Iowa City 20 years ago from San Francisco.  He went on to write the landmark book, Postville, which chronicles the divide between the Postville, Iowa residents and the Jewish community that moved to the small town to establish a successful kosher slaughterhouse/meat processing plant.


My quarrel with Prof. Bloom is not because of this topic.  Rather, it is with the way he regards, and writes about, what he calls his "adopted" state.  20 years later, he still seems to view Iowa and Iowans as beneath him.


Today I read an article, published in The Atlantic, and written by Prof. Bloom, in which he attempts to explain to non-Iowans why our country's presidential nomination race begins in Iowa.  After 20 years living here, he feels well qualified to make observations about Iowa and its residents, especially residents of rural Iowa.


The gist of the article seems to be that all Iowans, particularly rural Iowans, are gun-toting, tractor-riding, poverty-stricken, uneducated hicks.  How in the world can such people be qualified to begin the process of picking the next Democratic or Republican presidential nominee?


Let's see if I can find some choice quotes from the article, titled Observations from 20 Years of Iowa Life.

"I've written a couple of books on rural Iowa, traveling to all 99 counties, and have spent much of my time when not teaching, visiting with and interviewing Iowans from across the state. I haven't taken up hunting or fishing, the main hobbies of rural Iowans, but I'm a fan of University of Iowa Hawkeye football, so I'm a good third of the way to becoming an adopted Iowan." 


"Keokuk, is a depressed, crime-infested slum town. Almost every other Mississippi river town is the same; they're some of the skuzziest cities I've ever been to, and that's saying something."


"Whether a schizophrenic, economically-depressed, and some say, culturally-challenged state like Iowa should host the first grassroots referendum to determine who will be the next president isn't at issue. It's been this way since 1972, and there are no signs that it's going to change. In a perfect world, no way would Iowa ever be considered representative of America, or even a small part of it. Iowa's not representative of much. There are few minorities, no sizable cities, and the state's about to lose one of its five seats in the U.S. House because its population is shrinking so precipitously. Still, thanks to a host of nonsensical political precedents, whoever wins the Iowa Caucuses in January will very likely have a 50 percent chance of being elected president 11 months later. Go figure."


"Indoor parking lots are ramps, soda is pop, lollipops are suckers, grocery bags are sacks, weeds are volunteers, miniature golf is putt-putt, supper is never to be confused with dinner, cellars and basements are totally different places, and boys under the age of 16 are commonly referred to as "Bud." Almost every Iowa house has a mudroom, so you don't track mud or pig shit into the kitchen or living room, even though the aroma of pig shit is absolutely venerated in Iowa: It's known to one and all here as "the smell of money."


"Friday fish fries at the American Legion hall; grocery and clothing shopping at Wal-Mart; Christmas crèches with live donkeys, sheep and a neighborhood infant playing Baby Jesus; rifle-toting hunters stalking turkeys in the fall (better not go for a walk in the countryside in October or November). Not many cars in these parts of America. They're vehicles, pronounced ve-HICK-uls -- 4X4's, pick-ups, snowmobiles). Rural houses are modest, some might say drab. Everyone strives to be middle-class; and if you have some money, by God you'd never want to make anyone feel bad by showing it off. If you go to Florida for a cruise, you keep it to yourself. The biggest secret often is -- if you still own farmland -- exactly how many acres. Ostentatious is driving around town in a new Ford F-150 pickup."


"Rules peculiar to rural Iowa that I've learned are hard and fast, seldom broken: Backdoors are how you always go into someone's house. Bar fights might not be weekly occurrences, but neither are they infrequent activities. Collecting is big --whether it's postcards, lamps, figurines, tractors, or engines. NASCAR is a spectator sport that folks can't get enough of. Old-timers answer their phones not with "hello," but with last names, a throwback to party-lines. Everyone's phone number in town starts with the same three-digit prefix."


"Religion is the glue that binds everyone, whether they're Catholic, Lutheran, or Presbyterian. You can't drive too far without seeing a sign for JESUS or ABORTION IS LEGALIZED MURDER. I'm forever amazed by how often I hear neighbors, co-workers, shoppers, and total strangers talk about religion. In the Hy-Vee grocery store, at neighborhood stop-and-chats, at the local public school, "See you at church!" is the common rejoinder."

"For our son's eighth birthday, we wanted to get him a dog. Every boy needs a dog, my wife and I agreed, and off we went to an Iowa breeding farm to pick out an eight-week-old puppy that, when we knelt to pet her, wouldn't stop licking us. We chose a yellow Lab because they like kids, have pleasant dispositions, and I was particularly fond of her caramel-color coat. Labs don't generally bite people, although they do like to chew on shoes, hats, and sofa legs. Hannah was Marley before Marley.

Our son, of course, got tired of Hannah after a couple of months, and to whom did the daily obligation of walking the dog fall?

That's right. To me.

And here's the point: I can't tell you how often over the years I'd be walking Hannah in our neighborhood and someone in a pickup would pull over and shout some variation of the following:

"Bet she hunts well."

"Do much hunting with the bitch?"

"Where you hunt her?"

To me, it summed up Iowa. You'd never get a dog because you might just want to walk with the dog or to throw a ball for her to fetch. No, that's not a reason to own a dog in Iowa. You get a dog to track and bag animals that you want to stuff, mount, or eat.

That's the place that may very well determine the next U.S. president."

And there you have it.  My question is, why in the world is Prof. Bloom still living in Iowa if he feels such disdain for his "adopted" state and its residents?   He proclaims to know Iowa and Iowans after living here for 20 years, but I disagree.  It's obvious he clings desperately to the stereotypes that formed in his mind before he even moved here!  

Every state, not just Iowa, has small towns and rural areas.  Farmers.  Language that is regional.  Traditions and rituals that are specific to that area.  Hunters.  People who own guns and hunt with them (whether I am a fan of this is a topic for another blog).  Dog owners who may or may not hunt with said dogs.  People who talk about religion and go to church and enjoy the socializing that goes with it.

Pigs.  Although the saying in Iowa is that there are more pigs than people.  

NASCAR fans.  People who drive trucks.  People who collect things.

I'm thinking Iowa IS representative of quite a lot, Prof. Bloom.   In addition to the things you mock and regard with disdain, Iowa is also representative of hard work, kindness, generosity, education, and honesty, to name just a few.

What your article shows, Prof. Bloom, is that you don't know your "adopted" state very well, even after 20 years.   Check your stereotypes at the door and really open your eyes to what does make this state and its residents special.  You have so much to learn.