Bullies...and Bullying

A high school friend posted a powerful status on her Facebook page and it really hit home.  I copied and pasted it to my status.  Here it is:

A teacher in New York was teaching her class about bullying & gave them the following exercise to perform. She had the children take out a piece of paper & told them to crumple it up, stomp on it & really mess it up but do not rip it. Then she had them unfold the paper, smooth it out & look at how scarred & dirty is was. She then told them to tell it they’re sorry. Now, even though they said they......were sorry & tried to fix the paper, she pointed out all the scars they left behind. That those scars will never go away no matter how hard they tried to fix it. That's what happens when a child bully’s another child, they may say they’re sorry, but the scars are there forever. The looks on the faces of the children in the classroom told her the message hit home.

Bullying, no matter when it happens in life, no matter how long it lasts, and no matter whether the bully says 'sorry' or not, affects the bullied for life.  It's true.  I know from experience.

I was bullied for years, at church, of all places.  I was little and shy and my bully knew just what buttons to push.  And no adult bothered to help.  Can you even imagine?  In church.  It screwed up my self-esteem for years, and I can still see the effects: the need for approval, the anxiety meeting new people, wondering why in the world someone would be interested in what I have to say.  Yep, those scars last a lifetime.

Years later, my bully apologized to me at our 20th class reunion.  I couldn't believe it, and I felt a weight leave my shoulders, a weight I didn't even realize was still there.  I was finally able to put it behind me.  Will I carry the scars with me?  Definitely.  Can I move past it?  Yes.  And it has made me more sensitive to the bullying I see around me.  Including someone I work with.

Be sensitive to the people around you, young and old, who deal with bullies.  Bullies are NEVER in the right.  The kid or the adult who is being bullied could use your support.  If someone would have just recognized what was happening to me and supported me, it would have made a world of difference.  

Be that person for your friend or family member who is being bullied.  Listen to them.  Believe them.  And let them know you love them.

Westward Bound!

Tomorrow we are heading west......western Iowa, that is!  On our way to Council Bluffs for the annual Iowa Library Association Conference!  The conference "travels" every year.  Last year it was in Coralville, so I got to sleep in my very own bed.  This year we travel 5 hours to the west.  The last stop on I80 in Iowa before you end up in Nebraska.

This year I am VERY excited because I am presenting at one of the pre-conferences.  Yep, as if the actual conference wasn't enough, there are 5 or 6 pre-conferences offered the day before the actual conference opens.  The actual conference is Thursday and Friday, and the pre-conferences are Wednesday.  The pre-conferences are all day sessions and focus on one specific topic.  The pre-conference I'm presenting is the "Decimating Dewey" session.  Getting rid of Dewey Decimal and replacing with Subject Headings.  We are doing this at the North Liberty Comm. Library (my library), the first public library in the state doing this!  It's exciting, and I can't wait to share my experiences with the 31+ librarians signed up for the session!

It should be a fun, interesting, and challenging week!  I'm looking forward to seeing colleagues from around the state, learning new things, and making new friends.

Would be fun to hit old town in Omaha one evening for dinner.  I've heard good things about some of the restaurants down there.  Anyone familiar with that area, or familiar with good places in Council Bluffs?

Such an Interesting Childhood!

A recent group on Facebook is "You Know You're from DeKalb Illinois when...." Such memories have surfaced in the last few days! School memories, friend memories, church memories. It's been a rush.

It makes me think about my childhood. DeKalb was such a wonderful town for a childhood. Big enough to be interesting, but small enough that parents didn't worry. We would be at the city pool all afternoon in the summer. We could ride our bikes all over and no one worried. We could go downtown with friends and no one cared. Ice skating at the Lagoon in the winter.

One set of grandparents lived in Sycamore, the next town. They lived in a very old house, and the cellar was stereotypically creepy. It was a great house. And Sycamore was the birthplace of the great Pumpkin Festival, with the best parade EVER. We would park in my grandma's driveway and walk down her alley to the parade route.

My mum is English, my dad's family had southern roots (My grandma Hayes made THE best homemade macaroni and cheese. I will never forget this). And we went to a Finnish Lutheran Church. The combination of these influences is something I hold incredibly dear. I truly believe that, only in the Midwest, can you find a combination of influences like this. DeKalb had such a wonderful Finnish influence. I don't know anyone else, other than DeKalb people, who understand this.

Southern, English, and Finnish. What lucky kid, other than someone from DeKalb, would be lucky enough to benefit?

A REALLY Good Day : )

Today has been one of those days that have been just positive and productive, from start to finish. And for a Tuesday, that is magnificent! (Tuesdays and I have a love/hate relationship that goes waaaaay back).

Work was great. It was the first day of Summer Reading Program programs, from elementary age up to adult. The day was CALM. These first days in past years have often been 3 ring circuses, but today just seemed to fall into place for everyone.

My adult program was terrific. I had a Johnson County Master Gardener present a basic gardening program, and we had a small but enthusiastic group attend. Lots of conversation and sharing, and the presenter actually realized we had talked for over 90 minutes before we broke it up! It was wonderful to see the giving and receiving of information. Gardening is such a positive experience.

Yoga practice was amazing tonight. We had a different instructor, but her style was new and refreshing, and we did some different things and I felt SO GREAT! To my yoga friend Shalyn: I definitely feel taller tonight!

These good days are ones to savor. I think it will color the rest of my week.

Namaste.

Yoga Yoga Yoga

I am so incredibly glad we are taking these yoga classes. I've learned a couple of things in the last two weeks:

1. I am terribly out of shape.

2. I WILL accept a challenge.

3. I sweat. A lot.

We take two classes each week. Each class is very different, and each instructor is VERY different. They each have a different take on what they teach and how they give it. Our Tuesday class is more challenging in a way, but the instructor is very laid back. Our Thursday class is more for beginners, but the instructor is more "textbook," for lack of a better word.

But each class is sooooo enlightening and so AMAZING. I love being able to focus on nothing but myself for two hours a week. Listening to my body and what I can and can't do is nothing short of fantastic. Frustrating, yes. Sweaty, yes. But can I see myself doing this for a long time? Absolutely. Without a doubt.

Yoga is a great workout. It's also a great way to learn about oneself. Thanks to Gillian for suggesting this.

Namaste.

Downward Dog!

Gillian and I started 6 weeks of yoga tonight. It's going to be amazing, but right now I feel like jello! It's been too long since I've done any serious yoga, and wow, I can tell! I just keep thinking ahead to 6 weeks from now, and how amazing I will feel. We're doing two classes a week for 6 weeks, and I have a feeling this is just the beginning.

A great Mom/Daughter program for us. I love it.

So Neglectful!

I can't believe I have posted since January 2nd! What in the world?

Winter was rough. I honestly don't think I'm supposed to live in the "snowbelt" for the rest of my life. I don't know if it's just that I really hate the winter, especially as we get to February, or if I might suffer from SAD. Regardless, this winter thing is for the BIRDS. I don't mind some brisk, cool weather. It's the long, grey days that really get to me.

But spring is here! Or, it was, until this week. But, it's lighter now, so I can deal. And I know the chilly weather will be short-lived. I can do it.

We have Baxter the fabulous Beagle living with us for the next week. He has been here for a week now, and he is such a joy. His daddies are on vacation, so we are dog sitting. What a delightful house guest he has been so far. He is pure love.